I made a Tinder.
Okay, my friend and I made one together as a joke. It’s actually a lot of fun stalking and trolling people. I know that sounds creepy, but it’s not like I’m ever gonna meet any of those people, so I don’t really care. In theory Tinder’s a matchmaking app, but most people just use it to find hookups. I certainly have no desire to hook up with anyone I’ve never even talked to before.
To be honest, I think they concept of online dating is complete bullshit. I hope that doesn’t offend anyone because it’s just my worthless opinion. Talking face to face with strangers, especially people you’re attracted to, is hard as hell. You get nervous, you blush, you stutter, you wish you can just fucking kill yourself. I’m sure we’d all love to do the awkward introductions behind our laptops. But who says love is easy? God, that sounds so cheesy. Oh, well. We’re supposed to fight for love, aren’t we? Open our damn hearts and wait for some asshole to rip them apart, then sew them together and wait for them to be torn apart again. Then if we’re lucky, one of these days someone might decide that this heart looks better stitched together than ripped apart. Then and only then can we stop fighting and stop hurting.
I don’t believe in love at first sight or everlasting love, but I do believe that love should be ugly and real. Real is ugly. Real is embarrassing and painful and raw and transformative. Real is not the person we are on the internet. We always want to look good. That’s just human nature. On the internet, we have the luxury to embellish and edit our images without leaving a trail of suspicion. We can take as long as we want to think of a funny catchphrase or build a compelling alter-ego or construct some deep philosophical argument that we don’t actually believe in. That’s why online dating is so phony. Because you never know if you’re getting the person you think you’re getting.